SMALL INSTRUCTIONS #5

As punishment for your not having read my previous message as of yet, tonight you will be forced to your knees, and as I take out my cock and stroke it in front of you, I may decide not to allow you to taste my warm tumescence. You must beg me for it with your eyes and if you aren't convincing enough I will punish you as I see fit. When I am through bringing you the pain that makes your body quiver with excitement, that hardens my stiffening wand to bursting, you will be requested to slowly ease your hand up my waiting ass. I want to feel your tiny hand inside me slowly coaxing my shivering body to respond. You will jerk and suck my cock down your waiting throat and when I am through having my pleasure satisfied you will receive a tender, deserved spanking until your tears are no longer yours but mine alone. Tonight, you are here for my pleasure. You will remember how you serve me and every day while I am gone, you will accept that your service will be missed and that when we next see each other all of our smoldering desire for each other will flow through us igniting the passion longed for over the miles.

A COLLECTION OF EARLY SHORT POEMS ON LUST & LONGING

for Charlene...



MEMORY

Instead, I’ll feel your breath on my chest
And like a blindman
Memorize every line.

-- Ocean Beach, 1979



ACCOMPLICE

Love your neck, nipples, mouth on rising.
Roaming inclines suspended.

-- La Mesa, 1980



FLEETING GLIMPSE

Wounded wheels
Cut the night long.

Dilapidated taxi’s mirrored eyes –
I fantasize you there
My fingers warm
Exciting you.

$19 this side of poor
I touch myself
Dreaming of your skin in my mouth
And I pull my hair
The way that you do.

--San Diego, 1980



OPEN WINDOW

I dampen her
sleeping body, watching it dry
and the blood flows on beneath her skin.

-- Ocean Beach, late 70s

AFTERGLOW

Not the whirrrr of leaves and branches
But the kind of sound kids make with their lips
To overdramatize wind.
Sounds like people rolling over and over
On clean sheets.

-- San Diego 1979

ONCE IN A BLUE MOON SPECIALS AT EVERYDAY LOW PRICES

Glistening leaves fall from her
Snowflakes my beard. Some not-so-mirage
Trembles under her skin. The taste of her pleasure
Brings us together. I dress hurridly to stand in line
Behind 3 pre-law students trying to beat the bar.
(in the aisles I felt her stickiness, her breath, her quivering
on my face. Standing in front of the bread I wanted to rip open
a loaf of “Regular Wonder”, sponge my face
gulp it down, sending her deep into me...)
a woman glides in for yogurt
dressed to kill, long legs and fine form
slipped into a dress that turns the eyes of shoppers,
boxboys, needles, potatoes and hurricanes
trapped in Drano bottles. I smile at the hour-old sweat
drying on my legs and the lacy sounds of movements echoing on my tongue.
(a block away sits a warmth that beats this walking pulse to death,
a touch that withers this flowered breast, a smile that screams, “More”)

-- Ocean Beach, 1979

THE RACK

Her pink nipples an inquisition to bear
harsh light of her porcelain flesh blinding
Soft underbelly midriff terror
Rosebud Pavlovian lie detector
Nightmare vision of never again, there against my beating heart
Waking, sweat drenched fear of not seeing her eyes smile into mine…
Sheer torture.

~ for Charlene, s. rockfield, sometime 2000